So what should you do? Finding your way back to a calm, sensible frame of mind may not be easy. First, you need to ask yourself a few questions, and you need to answer them honestly.
1) Is the reason for the argument with your girlfriend/boyfriend important? Are you both making too much of it? Is it a small disagreement, just a misunderstanding or a major thing?
2) Does it have to be argued about now? Can it wait?
3) Will arguing actually achieve or change anything, or should you just let it go?
4) Is it really worth an argument?
If you find that the answer is ‘no’, then let it go. This will definitely make your girlfriend/boyfriend happy and, as a result, you will be happy. In any event, a major argument can often be avoided if you are willing to choose the right time to discuss things. In the heat of the moment we all say things that we don’t mean. Leave it until your emotions are in check. You will have a clearer head and will be able to articulate your ideas all the better. Be patient and civil and you should be able to find a middle ground. Talk it through together. Two calm heads are better than two hot heads.
An argument doesn’t mean that a relationship is over. If you have let it get out of hand, agree on a time and a place to talk it through. When you do get together with your girlfriend or boyfriend, it is of prevailing importance that you listen to each other. Let your girlfriend/boyfriend talk without interruption. Wait until she/he has finished before you speak and really listen to what is being said. It is easy to become defensive without looking at the big picture. Consider his argument. Be willing to take criticism. Does he have a point? Is it fixable? Can you agree that you will work on it? This tells her/him that you are really listening and willing to compromise. This is a great way to avoid a relationship argument.
Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself, but try to avoid simply responding to his complaint with one of your own. Present one side of the argument at a time. Consider those aspects of your relationship that she/he is right about. Consider those aspects that you are right about. Can you both work together to fix them? You need to compromise and find a middle ground where you are both happy.
Following these simple rules on how to make your girlfriend/boyfriend happy and avoid relationship arguments will go a long way to make your girlfriend/boyfriend happy and, as a result you will be happy and your relationship will flourish. Above all, keep talking and keep it civil and you’re bound to eventually agree about something. When you do, recognize and celebrate the agreement. All you have to do then is to build on it and before you know it, things will be better than ever.
